Scott+S.

It’s very common for people to preconceive a person based on their gender. Looking at a man, you think masculine which is all about strength, courage and honorable behavior. If a girl shows up, your first thought that your mind receives is feminine and her elegance and creativity. Today, gender doesn’t split up much of our society, but after speaking with my mom, she tells me that when she was a kid, women had much less power as they do today. They weren’t given the right to do simple things like vote. Rights weren’t the only things to separate the differences between men and women. Women would be into ice skating and dancing much more then today. Girls are playing some of the most masculine sports today, like lacrosse. Looking deeper into lacrosse, I notice some differences between the male part of it and the female part of it. When men play, they use much more padding because the rules are modified to allow rougher play. Girls don’t even use face masks because they don’t need to worry about getting checked, which is getting hit by the opponent’s stick. Another thing my mom mentioned was that girls are much more career minded these days. They want to go to college and get good jobs to help their husbands in particular with supporting the family. Men have always been the general spouse to be relied on by the family. The rest of the family expects the men to make all of the money so its good that women became more involved in that. That whole career idea is revolved around men. Even my mom’s job title represents a man because she’s a salesman. My mother’s mom’s career was in designing. She worked for a number one seller at the time Ethan Allen and later owned an antique store. I wouldn’t be able to picture a masculine man pursuing a career like this, back then or now. My dad is in the real estate business, which is seen as a male’s job typically. My mother thinks that gender views has changed dramatically and that it is a big step forward in America. She believes that if most of the things that are thought of today are by men. If we have as many women thoughts as men, we would have a much more advanced life. Today is just the beginning of women’s revolution as they constantly become more and more important in our society.

I liked that most of your essay was your opinion on gender in our society, but you might want to add some of your mom's thoughts on this. Really good vocabulary. -Amanda

Sweet vocab bro. you should add more anecdote. ask your mom about some examples of sexism that she experienced. ~Signor Valenti

I agree with Amanda, I like how it was in your opinion. You had a lot of good examples, so you should get your mom's opinions on those in addition to yours. Really good essay.

I agree with Amanda and Allie. You should really add your mom's thoughts in order to contrast your ideas about women who are working and her personal expierences about working. - Carolyn :)