John+F.

A little girl is walking through a department store with her mother in need of new clothes. They walk to the girls clothing area. Her mother picks out several pink and purple dresses, skirts, and tops. The girl, although she likes pink, wonders to herself why she can’t where blue like her brother. Reluctantly, she does not express her feelings and does as her mother tells her to do. That little moment was a true experience of my cousin, Laura. I’m sure plenty of people have had a moment like that too. It happens every day. Children question gender stereotypes. A girl may ask why she can’t wear blue or play with trucks or play sports while a boy may ask why he can’t wear pink or play with “dolls” or learn to cook. Maybe I should rephrase. They think this or imagine what would happen if they did ask but they usually keep it bottled up inside. Perhaps they think they’ll be laughed at by their friends or ridiculed by their parents for wanting to be different from the “norm”. Perhaps they feel that their friends and family won’t understand. Or maybe they think they will be punished for wanting to be different. For whatever reason, kids never tell. But why?

COMMENTS I think that it is a good starting for your essay but you need to expand more on it and you should add your ideas and theories.- Riya I agree with what Riya says. However, I like how you used an anecdote to start off your essay and how you ended with a question. Try to expand more on your ideas. -Tiffany I think it's pretty good so far, but you need to explain everything more...- Abby

I agree with above and suggest you expand by describing a situation where someone went outside the norm--shouldn't be hard to do--but not a pink/blue anecdote, maybe one about boys who aren't into sports and dislike the "jock" mentality, or girls who remain tomboys too long. We claim everyone should be themselves and be unique, but in practice we make it hard on kids to do so. MrC

This is a great anecdote, I think that you should talk more about how your cousin felt.-Kristina