Kristina

"It’s a man's world out there and to succeed, you have to be a man in a woman's body."- my mom, Sarah Barry My mom said this because when she was working, she was not given the respect that she deserved. She said that to get respect you had to act like men and think like men, because it was the only way to earn respect and be taken seriously. She found it frustrating that even when working at a high level, she was still mocked and excluded because she was a women (and blond.) It was at a point that it was effecting her work, the men would go out to lunch with clients or go golfing with clients and they told her she couldn’t come, even if she was trying to get a client. And the men she worked with knew what they were doing too, they purposely gave her a lot of clients to get, so they could watch her fail. But she didn’t, she worked twice as hard as everyone else to show she had earned the right to be there. Even though its hard growing up as a boy or girl, growing up as a girl is harder. I am not only saying this because who I interviewed is a girl and I am a girl, I am saying this because it is true, even my dad agrees. My mom grew up as the youngest of two, her older brother was a boy. She was expected to help cook, clean, shop, work in the garden, and help her mom. Her brother, Eric, mowed the lawn and helped his dad. My grandpa has a one track mind when it comes to jobs in the house. He was raised that it was the man's responsibility to work to support the family while it was the woman's responsibility to take care of the house. He did not cook or clean, and he did not let my mom's brother cook or clean either. *  //I wipe the sweat off my brow as I pull the turkey out of the oven. I hear another ripple of laughter coming from the living room. Dad and Eric were sitting and talking about the news. They sit there every day, expecting that food will just show up for them and they take it for granted. They don’t know what type of effort goes into the food, they never cook! They sit there and complain that the potatoes don’t have enough salt when mom and I try so hard. They would be helpless without us.// *  During dinner my grandpa and uncle would sit in the living room and talk while my mom and grandma would make dinner. This really irritated my mom, she didn’t think it was fair for them to sit there while she worked hard. In my mom's school, they didn’t even let girls take technology, the girls were forced to take family and consumer science. They didn’t give girls opportunities in school because at the time, girls were expected to go to school for a few years, get married, have kids, and them care for them and the house. Girls were not expected to go to college at all, they were considered "bubble brains" so if they did bad in school it was okay because people thought they aren't going to do anything in life but take care of a family. My dad grew up as the youngest of eleven kids (six boys and five girls.) He was practically raised by his sisters because his mom had so much to do. In his house, the girls were expected to cook, clean, take care of the other kids, and help their mom out with whatever she needed. The boys were expected to mow the lawn, wash the car, and fix stuff. My dad never had to do much around the house because he was the youngest so everything was already taken care of for him. My dad agrees with what my mom said about the women preparing the food while the men sat and talked. I live with my mom, my dad, and my older sister Elizabeth, and my two dogs. My dad travels a lot for work, so that leaves the cooking, cleaning, and taking care of me and Liz to my mom. Liz and I don’t really have chores, our mom might ask us to clean our room, but it is never a lot of cleaning. I help cook sometimes on the weekends, but my mom does most of the house work. In school now, girls and boys can take the same classes, and they are both expected to do well. No one would think that all girls are "bubble brains" and have to future in front of them. Girls have so many expectations to meet. They have social pressures to fit in, wear the right clothes, and act in the right way. They hid their feelings on the inside and pretend like everything is okay, because they are wanted to be perfect. They are expected to cook, clean, and help their moms. And people do not always think that they are as good as boys. Although people have started to treat girls better, I still feel like girls are stereotyped. When I think of how girls are stereotyped, I think of a Barbie, girls are pictured to be gentle, sweet, and dumb. The truth is, no girls are like that.
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COMMENTS I like how you related it to your own life but you are switching topics a lot and are not putting everything into context. But I still liked it. -Riya

I think that it's really good, but some of the topic changes might be hard to follow for some readers. -Abbyy

I sometimes couldn't tell when the time period was, and I think you can take out "was a boy" after her older brother because the reader knows that a brother is always a boy. But other than that, I like how you used quotes to support the context. -Tiffany